A N I S 97

Blackberry Bold



OR

NOKIA E71

pheewwww~

~aNiSr~

too much things to scribble here

but don't really sure where to start

new life

too early to predict

new job

too busy and confidential to share

new love

nothing to describe - seriously! ~:">

sesungguhnya saya kehilangan kata-kata~*wonder*


p/s: i'm addicted to High School Musical 3, fyi~ ;p


~aNiSr~

My lil' piece of advice and i am not sure whether it is useful for him or he wants to read all this after all

If he can spend that such amount, such thing for her, that is means that he's fall in love

I guess it is time for him to tell his beloved parents that he is now has new life, new beginning

Why?

Because his parents has other 'plan' in their mind

Before it is too late, i really urge him to tell them

And in fact, i am pretty sure that his parents especially his mom would be really happy to know that he has someone new in his life

Even though we had told them our stand

But his mom couldn't afford to accept nor agree our stand

Everything is back on him

To tell the truth

Before it is too late

And I do not want to be caught in middle of triangle or worst part - to be caught in emotionally

It has been 2 years ++, and i never thought about anything till that day we met at his place

For the sake of respect and care of the elders

His mom has mentioned every-single-detail that strike my mind

For me to give second chance, second hope

But it seems that i shouldn't give at first place after 2 years ++, but when we heard about the-every-single-detail, i thought i could

Seems the-every-single-detail is not complete which there is one part that his mom should know that, his beloved son now, has someone new that can make him happier

Too bad his mom didn't know and giving out her hope which is actually the only hope from her not from THEM - her son

I would like urge him, to tell her the truth

That is all I need

So that his mom would be clear and won't made any every-single-detail statement or any arrangement

So that we would not have any thought of something else - seriously


~aNiSr~

just came back from Delicious Cafe @ Bangsar Village 2 for Team Dinner~

and i had 2 Main Dishes~ Spicy Seafood Spagetini & Cod something-something ;p

and there goes for the title~

colleagues had few Cocktails, Mocktails, Martinis and other freaky alcoholic drinks but it looks like am the one who feel dizzy and whacko here~


lalalala~


~aNiSr~

i cried~

when heard about the news! but most importantly the way he popped up the Big Q (basically the big Statement i shall say ;p)!

happiness & joy~

can't describe how happy and overwhelmed i am~

Miss Butterfly - her Another-Half proposed!

and the way he proposed, oh God! in front of their Uni-mates! plus a hand-made-video~ oh dear~ he is so LOVELY & ROMANTIC!

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~~~~

and am going to be her 'orang kuat' for her mini-Big day - Engagement Day~ :D she has nominated me instead of me volunteered ;p

and of course, as usual, am sponsoring 2 'dulangs' for both sides~

like i said to her, it's been a while i've been a 'orang kuat' for everybody, what will happen later when it comes to my Mini-Big & Super-Duper-Big Day? ahahahhaha~ definitely i will reimburse back from all of you guys & gurls! ;p don't run~ ngeeee~

Oh dear Miss Butterfly~ missed you damn much! ~:">

met my primary schoolmates @ Great Eastern Mall. he picked me up~ fuhhh! siap statement 'baik maa'am besar!' dari beliau. suke aku apabila dapat membuli, ye la~ dulu time skolah skema sgt, skarang baru merasa buli-membuli ~ best ghuppeenyyeee~ ;p

verryyyy interesting dan penuh gelak ketawa ok! and seriously kami happy memaki di antara satu sama lain tanpa terguris di hati. mungkin terguris di prot ade la~;p

he used to be the most handsome & fairest boy of all during primary school. but now? he has been a big, very-chubby, and berlipat prot man. ngeeee~ he's almost like a beruang kutub, the only that differentiate between a beruang kutub and him is die berbaju dan boleh bercakap dan tak brenti ketawa besar. ;D keji ke statement haku? die bace ni, sure die kate aku lontarkan tohmahan pade die~ lalalaa~

and i've met my best girlfriend during primary time which basically kami dah lame keep in touch setelah sekian lame. tp si mamat beruang kutub ni sebok la pi jumpe my gurlfren ni yg tgh keje, tapi malu~ so at the end, we lepaking dan gelak-ing while my best gurlfren bekerja dan melihat kami bergelak ketawa. sian you~ ;(

i had 1 ice lemonade tea +2 superb-superlicious ice chocolate ~ thihihi~ thank you gurl~ best frappeS @ drinkSSS of the night!

~aNiSr~

Dear Mr. Used-To-Be-Another-Half,

Congratulations!

It is a joyful news. And I am sure that this is the ONE after all.

Am sure this time, you won't ever tired to ask her to slim down or asking when she gonna slim down~ hahahaha ;D~

Hey~ take good care of her aight! Am always pray the best for you bro'~

~aNiSr~

no~ am not getting married or anything ~ :p

i just met someone who catched my attention on our first not-to-say-first-date coz' basically i knew him somewhere back when he used to work at same place. but we were always get together especially with errr~ his Used-To-Be-Another-Half~ yeah! i know~ he used to be my colleague's Another-Half and it's lil' bit annoyed me because i knew her VERY WELL. we used to get together, went for group vacation and so forth.

it's so rare when someone can catch your attention during your first time meeting up together - when there's ONLY both of you were there. i mean, so rare for me because i believed in first impression and it's very hard for anybody to give good first impression. i know i do! lalalala~

oh~ by the way, i think Used-To-Be-Another-Half has someone new in his life. Yipppieee! Am happy for him. But of course, he won't reveal it till he's SOOOOOoooOOoo ready. how do i know? hahaha~ it's just instint~ :D but can't wait for that moment thought! but am glad he's moving on. and i believe he definitely will and he is! i know he can find a perfect one~

~aNiSr~

Still catching up to change my blog's layout. Jadi, saye hanya mampu tukar kaler setakat ini ;p

~aNiSr~

it's weird when saw he's online
when he saw me online
but doing nothing
nobody wants to break the ice
oh~ let me rephrase that
he did try to break the ice - twice
but me?
but is that it?
buzz twice and that's it?

*i'm off to bed~ tdo lepas sahur sangat menyeronokkan~ ngeee~

~aNiSr~

it's been a great memory for us to talk about her~
yeah! we use to tease each other about her~
i said 'die kawan baik u ;p' and he gonna say the same thing~sometimes even worse~
we used to gossip about her too~
we tend to made fun of her - of course behind her back ~ thihihii~
we matched her with his best friend,
we even used to bet over her!
that was good time, we laugh together,
no doubt, it's fun though
ye~ kami sangat nakal and the keji moment together~ahahaha~
i think she read my blog and i guess she gonna be 'penyibuk' to know the really story
might be she asked him or at least try to be a listener to one of us
she tried to ask me
might be she's trying to ask him too
about us
but BUZZ OFF girl!~
don't ask anything, ain't tell you anything
unless he told her everything~ haih~
because i know him
if he's in not in 'good' condition, when someone asking him, he tend to tell
i knew that but then that was during our best moment together as good friends
she would asked him, coz' she can see the similarity between the story in my blog and what she saw on her !YM main window - list of friends - status

by the way girl, there's nothing happen between us. it's just GOOD FRIEND conflict situation. don't try to be middle-person, will you?
mind your own business please~ yes, we mind ours~ thank you~


~aNiSr~

My claim is in the account today! tp one day float~ but still~ weeeee~ ;p

huh~ anyway~ besides that, i saw his status on !YM and it does strike me~

~ak sayang kamu kerana kawan~

what do you think?

i don't think it is for me but part of it? or lil bit? ehhehehe~

but if that's the answer of my recent post on 14th September '08, fyi, i am VERY sure and clear bout that for longggg time ago and it has never change since then. i wonder, all this while, did i give wrong impression to him? duhhh! :'(

if he thinks that i walked away from him just because of that, he got the wrong idea. means that, he still don't understand of why-and-what. i know one day he will. but i guess he's gonna give up in middle of the journey and just forget about everything, every single think about us.

inilah akibat apabila orang terlalu reserve atau susah nak berkomunikasi secara berdepan~ errr~ face-to-face ~:"> my bad? haih~

~aNiSr~

Thank you lil darling for the tagged~
Maaf lambat sket dong~ :">

• What were the 5 things on your to do list today?

Am glad

that

i

lose

the

TRUST

towards

him

and

it's

hard for me to

turn back...

~aNiSr~

' He doesn't care as much as I do'

Together with away-gesture from him
Not talking, not !YMing, not SMSing
This statement made us apart, slowly
For few days
Even then, i've thought back that i should SMS him back when I'm back with normal-mode
But then, i surprised when he said that he actually kinda grumble with my so-called-statement and he thinks that statement was made for him
I didn't give an answer for his question

But truly enough, it's for him
But the thing is, i can't explain to him what is all about
Even he made his own assumption which is not really the main reason why. (yeah! might be lil' bit, just tiny bit~)

The fact is, i felt he doesn't care that we are a good friend, doesn't treat me like a good friend (or i shall say, not to my expectation).
I felt that i'm just an plain ordinary friend like others
I can't tell him straight when he made his assumption back then, that is why i told him that i should - SILENCE

My point is,
He still reserved, keep so many things away from me. If i don't give a damn to ask, he won't simply tell
I know there is a BIG thing that he keep away for himself which i think it is important for me to know.
Maybe i don't carry bigger weight of friendship & trust for him. That is why he doesn't tell me much.

Like he said,

'i tak kesah syg atas ape ar cam u serious i sygkan u...'

and till today, i do not have a chance to ask him why he said that and what he meant by that. From bottom of my heart, if he really means that he loves me as his good friend, he should change.

I can't tell him to change. For what? For me? No, it's just for his own good.

But now, i felt so empty when talked to him. The trust just simply blown away, the love is just gone.

I do not expect more than a good friend. But if good friend-indicator seems too much for him, i better off without saying anything. It happened before. To others.

Sometimes, something happen doesn't need any explanation. It just happened.

He won't lose anything because he still got his own good friend who always need his help, who always depend on him. And good enough that he is treating her well.

At the end of the day, is it just me being so calculative then? Am I demanding too much?

~aNiSr~

yeah yeah~ i know~ it's been A while that i haven't update anything here. and i know few (quite more than few by the way ;p, i can track, remember? :D) people went thru my page and went like 'errrr~budak ni tak hapdet lagi ke since 20th August?' maaf ~:">

only these words can describe current situations :

• too much
• over-too-stress
• too sick
• and lots of too's coming up! :'(

::: apakah di sebalik plastik putih itu? :::

::: thiihihii~ ;p :::

went thru my MOST FAV CUPPIES late evening before i went home from office and i saw her latest promotion, and am like huwaaaaaaaa~ aku perlu dapatkan ini untuk memastikan sugar level saye seimbang di bulan Ramadhan ini! ngeeee~ without further due ceeccece~ text her and booked all three! :D thank you laling~;D heart you very much! *~wink*


* Darl~ thank you for the nomination~ tak sempat lagi nak mengepost la dear~ :"> *hugs*

It's already 12th night of Ramadhan but not too late to wish y'all~

***Salam Ramadhan ***

~aNiSr~

i can't stop to feel sad

my emotions - too deep to describe

i can't stop crying when i thought about it

i felt so pity, sorry for him

i wished that there is other way to help him out

but he made the decision

at least, he shared everything

even it was so hard for him

very hard to explain

but i do understand

i know i can't afford to lose him

or maybe i won't lose him after all

even he thought that he might losing me

it seems to make us closer

even better

i believe it will work out

i will never stop to care about him

he always made me feel 'being a good friend' is just worth it

~aNiSr~

truly am addicted with Usher's latest album - Here I Stand
and this song~ errrghhh! i love it~ ;p is there such signage out there? thihihi~


"Will Work For Love"

Can you help me?
Anybody out there help me
Please can you help me?

Excuse me mister, I fell on hard times, I need some help
But don't need a dime, don't earn a way, I'll wash your clothes
If you let me stay, find your revoke,
Day after day, people walk by, I can't catch their eyes
I Pull out my sign,

It says:
Will work for love
I will I'll work for love, overtime
Baby, it says will work for love
I will I'll work for love, for all my life
I will work for love

Can you help me? (help me)
Anybody out there help me (does anybody out there)
Please can you help me?

Excuse me you two, got love to spare?
Search my whole heart, it ain't none in there
Pardon me sister, I'm on my last
Don't have no love, that's OK, God bless

Day after day people walk by, I can't catch their eyes
I Pull out my sign, it says:
Will work for love
I will I'll work for love, overtime
Baby, it says will work for love
I will I'll work for love, for all my life
I will work for love

It says:
Will work for love
I will I'll work for love, overtime
Baby, it says will work for love
I will I'll work for love, for all my life
I will work for love

I remember the day I lost my heart (hey yeah)
Took it for granted I went to far
Fall down, cried and to feel that love again
I Hold on this sign till the very end
Do anything

I will I'll work for love, overtime
Baby, it says will work for love
I will I'll work for love, for all my life
I will work for love

~aNiSr~

it's just striked while i was driving back to KL from so-many-places today.

it's been a while 'closests' didn't give a tinkle.

i just read his page this early morning and i managed to guess which one.

and this time, i felt, this is the ONE.

i've deep thought that his 'closests' are now realized that we won't or just couldn't be together

even they've been supportive but at the end of the day, it's all about him and his decision

and now, i am away, far far away

from him & his 'closests'

i just want to take good care their feelings, and most obvious, mine~

~aNiSr~

"Moving Mountains"

It's like whatever I do,
Ooh
Just can't get through to you
Ooh, ooh
I'm never gonna tell anything wrong
Ooh, ooh,
Listen
Oh

Now, now she loved me, shawty I loved her
Used to jump up in the maybach and roll out
Used to care, she used to share
The love that she used to give me can't be found
I lost my way, she said she'd stay
And lately I've been sleeping with a ghost
My stock is down and out, I used to be worth my weight in gold
That was before a great depression kicked in and rocked us
And that was before the hurricane came in and stopped us
I told you to leave, but you lied to me
When you said that, baby no worries I promise to get us back

I know sorries, just wouldn't do it
Her heart is obliterated, I'm trying to travel through
But it's like moving mountains...
It's like moving mountains... hey.
But I keep climbing and hoping things would change
And the sky turns gray, and the water from the rain washes progress away.
It's like moving mountains... (moving mountains)
It's like moving mountains... (moving mountains)
Why just leave me?
Just leave me be
Just leave me
Just leave me be
Why you just leave me
Just leave me be
Why you just leave me
Just leave me be, ooh, ooh
Be, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoaaa, whoa

She, she don't touch me, I don't touch her
We rarely even ever say a word
I really want to give her everything she deserves
But the bad took away the good
She thinks that I'm full of it, arguments, always pissed, man I'm tired
Every kiss that I miss, girl you know I'm trying
You never believe when I say, and I never believe it when you say
I love you, and I shouldn't complain about it
I should take it like a man and walk up out it
Cause we will never be the same, ooh
I've been standing in gas and you have been the flame

I know sorries just wouldn't do it
Her heart is obliterated, I'm trying to get through
Got to move this mountain... yeah
It's like moving mountains... hey
But I keep climbing and hoping things would change
And the sky turns gray, and the water from the rain washes progress away
It's like moving mountains... (moving...)
It's like moving mountains... (moving...)
Well baby why you just leave me?
Just leave me be
Just leave me
Just leave me be.
Why you just leave me
Just leave me be
Why you just leave me
Just leave me be, ooh

This must be a slow death that I'm travelin on
It feels so wrong, I'm barely holdin' on...

See no matter what it takes, I've gotta get it together, baby yeah

And these hills that I'm travelin' up
She ain't showin me love
I'm down on my love
Oooh, I'm down
Whoa

I know sorries just wouldn't do it
Her heart is obliterated, I'm trying, I'm trying my boo
But it's like moving mountains... ey
It's like moving mountains... (moving these mountains) hey
But I keep climbing and hoping things would change
And the sky turns gray, and the water from the rain washes progress away
It's like moving mountains... (I'm trying)
It's like moving mountains...
Well baby why you just leave me?
Just leave me be
Just leave me
Just leave me be
Why you just leave me
Just leave me be
Why you just leave me
Just leave me be, ooh

Baby, baby
Whoa, yeah

by : Usher

or leave everything behind~

~aNiSr~

Referee : 'Kayu' - Tevez deserved to get penalty or at least free / corner kick when his ankle been pulled by Hreidarsson on penalty box.

Overall Game : Hell mess! Especially on Man U's but Porstmouth's played very well

Penalty : Can smell the over-confident on Man U and Porstmouth's kicked like first time playing

Feelings : Hampess~ haih~

Result : 0-0 (Penalty - Man U : 3, Porstmouth : 0)

~aNiSr~

heard the original song when i entered Nine West @ Pavilion today. haih~ it just stopped me for a while. when i reached home, searched for this song in my folder. then, i remembered that i've heard Female-Version of this song and i found out this plus Female Version by Kyla.
and, i just simply have a split thought of him.


Wait For You

ooh ooh
oooooh oooooh
ooh
Been a while since you and I've spoken but you have to know
All the reasons i felt the need to let you go, ooh
I gave u everything, but boy i never felt like u were there for me.
Started when u were leaving town like every week
I knew that you were seeing someone sexually, ooh
How could u lie to me?
It hurts inside of me
Theres no denying
That i had to go and get out of this
You were bad for my life.
It wasn't easy, no
And i was scared
But i had to do what was right.


I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I'm missing you,and I'm wishing you would come back through my door, ooh
Why did u have to go?
You could have let me know,
So now I'm all alone.
Girl you could've stayed but you coudn't give me a chance
With you not around its a little bit more then i can stand ooh
And all my tears they, keep running down my face
Why did u turn away?
So why does your pride make you run and hide
Are you that afraid of me?
But i know its a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you want it to be.


So baby i will wait for you
Cuz i don't know what else i can do
Don't tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life
Baby i will wait for you
If u think I'm fine it just ain't true
I really need you in my life
No matter what i have to do
Ill wait for you

Its been a long time since you called me
How could you forget about me?
You got me feeling crazy, ooh
how could you walk away
everything stays the same
i just cant do it baby
what will it take to make u come back
girl i told u what it is and it just aint like that
why cant u look at me
You're still in love with me
Don't leave me crying

Baby why cant we just
Just start over again
Get it back to the way it was
If u give me a chance
I can love you right
But your telling me it wont be enough

So baby i will wait for you
Cuz i don't know what else i can do
Don't tell me i ran out of time
if it takes the rest of my life
Ill wait for you.

Baby you can wait if you wanna
Can stay if u wanna
But today i ain't gonna come back
Boy u played your game like u wanted
And lost cuz u fronted
So today its ending like that.

by : Elliott Yamin ft. Nina Sky

~aNiSr~

got this song from Miss Always-Laugh and it's killing me. ahahhaha~ even there is nobody specific but truly enough it's haunting me :P

the arrangement, lyrics & musics = Perfect!

Cinta Ini Membunuhku

kau membuat ku berantakan
kau membuat ku tak karuan
kau membuat ku tak berdaya
kau menolakku acuhkan diriku

bagaimana caranya untuk
meruntuhkan kerasnya hatimu
ku sadari ku tak sempurna
ku tak seperti yang kau inginkan

kau hancurkan aku dengan sikapmu
tak sadarkah kau telah menyakitiku
lelah hati ini meyakinkanmu
cinta ini membunuhku

bagaimana caranya untuk
meruntuhkan kerasnya hatimu
ku sadari ku tak sempurna
ku tak seperti yang kau inginkan

by : D'Masiv

~aNiSr~

i heard he lose weight and i think i can see that. obviously!

good for him. happy that he achieved that he always wanted. at least he proved to himself or might be to his Another-Half.

so nobody can ever mentioned that obnoxious 'FAT' word again to him - NEVER! whether intentionally or unintentionally. better don't or else you gonna end like me.

i just thought something that i did last week. SMSed Mr.Used-To-Be-Another-Half. and i am so surprised that the big 'EGO' still stick to him and even worse.

i thought i've made the right step, asking how he's doing and all that, but then i think, i've made the wrong one.

had a good conversation with Mr.Sweet Talker outside my hommie today. and i felt more comfortable to tell him anything... feel so good when we still remains friends till to-date.

~aNiSr~

*while listened to Sempurna - Andra & The Backbone (supposed to cheer me up but end up, it reminds me to someone dear - used to be)

i can smell his attitude but too bad i still missed that.

it's just, there are quite a few unique attitude about him that hardly to forget and indescribable.

if he's reading this, am i entitled for his forgiveness?

i just hate to lose a friend, especially someone like him.

but hey~ did i forgive him for whatever he did to me? guess that's not important anymore.

i know he's with i-dunno-who-and-i-don't-really-bother and he wouldn't hide about that but do we still remains as friends? guess not

it's just his ego is beyond the limit but his maturity still below the edge

and it's better to follow his way, 'Stay a while and listen' ~


~aNiSr~

i knew this name while i was in Aussie. i saw one damn-nice Adidas t-shirt with her name on it and it looks so classy~

and i smell this - with combination of white rose, peony and freesia. it's just catch my scent on the spot.

Limited Edition Sheer Stella McCartney

~aNiSr~

i miss him~

miss his jokes

miss his sarcasm

miss his know-everything

miss his laugh

so much~

does he feel the same~ guess not~ ;"( oh! by the way, he's In Relationship - again~

~aNiSr~

Yeay! it's the day~

new pay slip

new salary

but only can feel new $$$ tomorrow ;p

next ?

Redeem Roxy Birthday Voucher! ~ weeeeeeeeeeee~


~aNiSr~

GF?

good!

take care of her~

be nice~

share the happy story ?

naaaahhh~ what for?

you know where to find me when you need me, especially when you are in trouble~

aight?

* i wonder why i've been surrounded by people who always VERY HESITATE to share when they are happy with someone else (High School BFF is exceptional, die bukan tak btau, aku yg blur~ :P)


miss her?

miss you?

ahahhaha~

so?

haih~

emo nemo la you ni Anis :P that's the fav line from Mr.Girls-Must-Fall-In-Love dedicated to me.

it's really hard to be a GOOD friend aight? it is~ i mean out there~ hard to them~ not for me~

~aNiSr~

i know i've made him feel so pissed even i don't which part that really burst him off

he dare to say that i always made him so mad, i always make fun of him

even till today, i don't know why i still be so patient and always tolerate with his attitude

but did i tell him, the REAL thing that really pissed me ( + others) off and i NEVER mentioned about it because i CARE his sensitivity and emotions?

explanation? he don't bother by the way

because to him, i'm the one, who ALWAYS made him pissed off, never care his emotions, i'm the one who literally DESPICABLE him

but i wonder why he never dare to ask why i treated him so well indeed even he always made me + OTHERs pissed off and he didn't realize about it or he couldn't care at all


~aNiSr~

this few days, i'm like~ BLUR. totally~

since last week especially on weekend.

first weekend without my High School BFF.

i've planned to watch movie or window shopping ~ at least. but turned out, Miss Butterfly went to Langkawi, Mr.Go-Carter's GF also went back to JB, Mr. Sweet Talker with his football tourny. and am totally lost! i dunno what to do~ who else am gonna called up for lepaking haih~

yesterday, i had LONGGGGGGGGGG chat with High School BFF. even though terputus kejap-kejap sbb bateri gueh 2-2 phones agak tenat. and in middle of the nite, she sms me with sangat sedih punye ucapan~ :(( and i called her back straight away~ wohoooo~ am you know what? am totally BLUR till i know she mentioned that SHE'S IN LOVE! and the best part is, i don't have any comment on 1st day she mentioned about it. she told me last week. but my response? 'err~oh~ ok~' hahahahah~ sangat lah pelik sahabat baik ku itu dengan comment saye tu. till yesterday, i shouted at her, dengan response dengan sangat tidak mempercayainya. 'haa~ tu la respon yang aku tunggu dari ko, jerit camtu, terkejut camtu. ini idak, hari tu aku cite, ko cam hmmm... ohh~ ok..hmmm~' thihihi~ maaf cik! :"> so can you imagine, how blur am i? haih~

anyway am SO HAPPY for her! and by the way, told her so many things that i couldn't dare to tell anyone else. and am relieved. even kinda sad on both of us are now quite a distance but still contactable. haih~ kalau salah sorang pi oversea, tak tau la cemane~ huhuuh~ kalah orang berchenta ni :P

yesterday, went out with Miss Schomi and she also noticed that i'm not being myself ' ko ni tak ape-ape ke? cam lain je aku tgk, cam blur semacam je? ko ok ke?' haih~ sangat nampak kah? toksah kan orang lain, even 'closest' keep on calling me and texted me asking the same. 'Anis ok ke ni?' in fact, she came to my office and passed her boss's resume to me. and when i met her, i though of giving her something but i don't know what. mule la excited cik'closest' saye tu~ then, i called her, but then tak tau nak cakap ape, letak phone. then after a while, called balik, tak tau nak cakap ape, then, suddenly i mentioned 'THE NAME' to her and asking her bla~bla~ and then i don't know what to say about 'THE NAME'. huhuhuh~ haalaaamaakkk~ teruk cenggini~ saye masih tercari-cari mengapa tetapi rasenye saye dah tau kot kenapa saye blur. and High School BFF knew about it and agreed! part of it , because of her, but the biggest part of it, errrr~:"> saye sendiri tak sangke saye telah meluahkannya~ to High School BFF lerrr~ ngeeeeeeee~

she understand, truly agree why~

hope will recover soon from this desease~ BLUR +++ (plus plus plus~) :D


~aNiSr~

i realize that there are silent readers out there

that keeping track of what i did, what am doing, and my plans for future

they might be wondering of how am getting through my life with or without them

and some of them just seeking of AN answer

which they keep on looking, silently

there are some parts that they have to understand that it is not about telling the truth will definitely change everything but things that lies underneath it

it is complicated

but to those who have the right courage will dare enough to discover between the lines

and fair enough that there is also some people who just let it go, couldn't bother and keep on going with their ego

as for them they really sure that they definitely gonna find the perfect one even there isn't one

even sometimes i missed some things, some people very much even they intentionally or unintentionally hurt me

deep inside, long time enough

too early for an apology?

am i in a right lane?

there is always a reason behind a drama

even we made up the script


~aNiSr~

i am all alone

i hate when comes to one part where nobody will be there for you

for hangout

for gossips

for anything

i never envy on what people have but i don't

because i believe that sooner or later that i'm gonna own it

it is just bad when we are trying so hard to understand and learn about other people

but it is just a burden for them to at least have a lil' tiny understanding towards us

when i thought that people really knows you

but at that moment, they actually avoiding you because they don't want to get to know you deeper

it's just a mess when they try to get back the understanding, gain back the trust

and truly enough, when you lose it, it is just long way to go to get it back


~aNiSr~